New job and its craziness

So at the begining of this month I started a 2nd job at our local farm adn outdoor equipment store. If you know me you this is my home away from home. Anything and everything john deere and fun garden stuff as well as cool little toys for the youngsters. So I have been there for about 3 weeks no and I am loving it. The people I work with are great. they have great sense of humors (minus, we will call her the “Mule”).

So my first problem customer happened last week. So you understand I had only been there for two weeks and I am still soaking everything in. I get to work and go to the back to put my nice little vest on and head up front to my register. Let me tell you, if you have one of these vests on it automatically makes you an expert on anything and everything in the store to anyone who needs help. THis nice lady came up and asked for my help to tell her the price on something I said sure. As she walks behind me back to my register this egoTESTICAL man rudely interrupts this lady and me and asks for help with lawn mowers. I tell yes sir i will have someone over here right away to help you. Everyone was busy. I conitue to help the lady after i get her the price the other cashier (who is so freaking sweet) tells me to be careful because people have been stealing close lately. So this man says m’am and I said I am coming. The other cashier is finishing her sentence aka telling me what to do. This ass yells HEY LADY!! I thought I would cry right then and there. The other cashier turns around on her toes and smiles at him from ear to ear while everyone in the store  is staring at this idiot. She walks over to him and begins to help him. He tells her I know you were busy telling her your plans for tonight but do you tink you could help me. If there was a wayI could combine the words idiot and asshole into one that would describe this guy to a tee. His poor wife was so ashamed!

I am sure there will be more drama with this job. This is my first time to really work with the public. My other job I stay in my little office and rarely see the day of light!

Keep watching for other crazy and wild mishaps staring your truly!

TruBlood Continued

I cannot express how much I love Charlaine Harris’ Sookie Stackhouse novels! They are intense and mind blowing in more ways than on. I am on book number 8 out of 9. I feel like I have only read 1. Its greeattt!!

Sookie Stackhouse is a character that anyone would want to be. Leading an exciting life and having a gift that I know I would love to have. Telepathy!

These books are hard if not impossible to put down once you have started reading them!

FIVE MEGA STARS!!!!

One obsession with my faults

Let me first say I love only Jeff (my man) and I know 1000% that he is the one for me, but I have a fault that he knows of but I tend to hide very well.

Everytime I find out an ex has gotten engaged or married it kills me. Not because I have feelings for them but because it is like a reminder that there is something about me that is so unbearable I ma not marriage worthly. Something alwasy gets to me and says “Your screwed up. See they are married and in love. They are marriable and lovable. YOU ARE NOT!!”

I know I should be happy and I am. I know I shouldn’t compare mine and Jeff’s relationship to anyone elses and I don’t.

I know it might seem like thats what I am doing but I swear i am not. I have no feeling for anyone other than Jeff. I am happy for those who have found someone in there life who loves them faults and all.

I have so many faults. What happens when Jeff decides he can’t get over all my annoyances. I worry about that.

I am not perfect, FAR from it and I worry that no one will ever be able to deal with me.

The good thing is I have always been ok with being on my own. I can go days without talking to anyone and be perfectly fine.

So i will be fine no matter what, I would just be happier with Jeff than alone.

I’m a smoker

I HAVE to vent about this in hopes that I might reach one of those idiots out there.

My boyfriend and I were talking about my unhealthy habit and something dawned on me. People smoke and people die because of smoking.

I know that and pretty much 100% of the world knows that. Right?

Well what is up with those people who get lung cancer and sue the tobacco companies.

I want to say right now that if this offends anyone I am sorry and I suggest stop reading now.

I know that smoking will eventually give me cancer and possibly cause my death. Doesn’t everyone know that so then why do families of smokers and smokers sue. It makes no sense to me. You knew what you were doing.

For crying out loud it says on the cartons and boxes that smoking is NOT HEATHLY.

It just frustrates me that there are so many stupid people in this world.

Its like overweight people sueing fast food restaraunts. Well stop eating there daily and exercise.

Its not like someone is holding you down and shoving Big Macs down your throat or making you smoke.

People isn’t time we take credit for what we have caused that is wrong in our life.

I have been doing it for years. Its your turn!

Here it is

I have been debating on posting this. I have been thinking about how this could come back to bite me in the butt, but pretty much anything and everything bad that could be caused from this situation has already happened.

Ok get ready this is a long one because I have to give all the details.

It was the day before easter and I was visiting family. My 3 yr. old nephew and I were playing outside (It was 4 in the afternoon). My sister told him to come inside because she didn’t want him to get dirty (she gave him a bath already). My dad said in a light hearted way ”let the kid play”. My sister then asks me what was said and I tell her and she said

“well I already gave him a bath”

I say “well why would you do that at 4 in the afternoon”

she says” Because I can”

I say ” Ok Good for you” This little comment is what set her off because when I said it I said it with a smile on my face and said it as sweet as I could.

She says ” Thats right”

I say ” I know, i said good for you”  in the same tone and the same big smile on my face. For those of you who aren’t big readers of my blog you won’t know that I have PCOS ( Ihave a blog about it for more info). Basically the doctors have told me it will be very hard for me to have children and pretty much a miracle. This is a very hard thing for me to live with.

She says “Well when you have kids, IF you have kids…..” After she said that part the rest of what she said went in one ear and out the other.

I start crying like no other and i was so furious. My sister has always said and done hurtful things to me. She use to make comments about my weight while I was growing up. I am not saying it has always been bad. We have had our moments. I have never said anything to her about how she hurts my feelings because I felt like  every time I would tell her how something hurt it was turned around on me. I am not saying i am innocent I have said some hurtful things but not like she has and not to my only sister. Back to the story… I am crying on the back porch and my mom is trying to console me about 2 or 3 minutes go by and my sister comes outside

She says in a cold and heartless way with no feeling ” I’m sorry, it just dawned on me how you took that and that is not how I meant it” She had this look on her face like she didn’t want to have to be out there apologizing to me. I feel and i can’t stress enough that this is what I think and feel, that the only reason she came out there and apologized was because someone heard what she said.

I begin to go off on her about how I constantly feel like I have to walk on egg shells around her to not piss her off.

My mom puts her hand on my shoulder and says “Kaci calm down. Look how calm your sister is being”

I say ” No. I can’t.” I said alot of things that I can’t remember word for word but I know the jist of what I was saying was about how mean my sister was and that she knew exactly what she was saying and she meant it to be hurtful.

My mom tries to calm us both down and puts her ( I remember this part so vividly) hand on my sister’s shoulder and says ” Kaci is just trying to say that she doesn’t feel your apology was sincere”

This is were it really goes down hill.

My sister took a step towards my mom and while flailing her arms says ” This is not between you and me this is between her and me” My sister was in my mother’s face yelling and for me that is a big no no.

I took a step between them and looked down on my sister and said ” Don’t you EVER get in my mothers face and yell at her like EVER again”

She pushed me.

I pushed her.

She threw a punch and missed.

I didn’t.

I remember hearing my mom yell for my dad and I remember him running and grabbing me. Let me explain a little side note. I have never EVER been in a fight and she has. I have though had to defend myself to my sister many times before this. When I lose my temper I yell and cuss and cry but I never say anything hurtful. I speak the truth of how I feel. My sister loses her temper she gets violent. I don’t want this to come across as if I am bad mouthing my sister because I am not. She is a wonderful person, she is just that way with everyone else but me. It has always been that way. back to the story….

About 4 hours of crying and begging for her forgiveness go by with no sign of moving on. The only thing that really makes me mad about this is that my sister denies she pushed me first and that she threw a punch. The thing is I remember and so do 4 other people who saw it all happen.

So now about 2 weeks go by and I send her flowers (that was drama too). The flower place calls me and tells me that the flowers were refused.

 I text her on mothers day and of course no responce.

Here is the cherry topper. Here is why I decided it was ok to blog this. There is nothing else that she can do to hurt me.

I can no longer see my nephew, even when he is visiting my parents. That hurt worse that losing her. We were never really never that close. Now though the cutest little boy in the world, one who stole my heart when he came into this world will never know who I am and I will never know who he grows up to be.